Biggest Pet Peeves of Buffalo Sabres Zamboni Drivers
by Jeff Wozer, Buffalo Sports Page Humorist
– New York requires 6 months of Zamboni Ed classes.
– Key Bank Arena’s ban on texting while ice resurfacing.
– Now that two Zambonis are used, must carry uninsured Zamboni insurance.
– Zamboni radio can’t pick up NPR.
– Rob Ray refuses to apologize for keying Zamboni’s hood.
– Zamboni license immediately revoked if caught exceeding Key Bank Arena’s maximum speed limit of 2 mph.
- – Doug Allen keeps begging to ride shotgun.
– Must bring your own Zamboni to DMV road test.
- – Still need cataract surgery from the blue ice experiment.
– Zamboni valet parking attendant always reeks of whiskey.
- – Running over Sabretooth carries 4 points on license.
- – When reporting engine troubles to a mechanic, management mandates we say nothing more than describing it as a lower engine injury.