By Jeff Wozer, Buffalo Sports Page Humorist
As the Buffalo Sabres sit in last place in the Eastern Conference, their chances of making the playoffs are pretty low. They are currently eight points behind the next worst team. With those odds in mind, Buffalo Sports Page comedian Jeff Wozer has researched what else has the same similar statistical probability of the Sabres making the playoffs.
- Marty Biron answering a question in under 500 words.
- Cloud 9 Smokes & Vapors becoming the official Vapor Store of the Buffalo Bills.
- Local TV news anchors and meteorologists retiring and actually staying retired.
- Watching ESPN and seeing a hockey highlight.
- Asking for a pound of cold cuts at Wegmans and the deli clerk not asking, “Is it okay if it’s a little over?”
- Not sensing disdain from WGR’s Mike Schopp when a caller begins with “How are you doing?”
- Someone visiting Niagara Falls for the first time and not being told, “The Canadian side is nicer.”
- Carl Paladino reveals he’s Olaf Fub.
- Watching ESPN longer than 20 seconds without seeing a basketball highlight
- Rob Ray becoming the spokesperson for kitchen countertops…Oh wait, that already happened. There is hope.