by Jeff Wozer, Buffalo Sports Page Humorist
Last week, World Wrestling Entertainment’s Vince McMahon announced the XFL will return. What kind of cutting-edge innovations can fans expect from the new league? Sports comedian Jeff Wozer has some ideas.
• Fifteen yard penalty for hitting a quarterback with a folding chair.
• Two points for any player who tackles using the airplane spin.
• Bicuspid Cam.
• Each team must have at least one out-of-control player from, or allegedly from, Samoa.
• Cheerleader cat fights.
• Backup players can’t enter game until tagging the hand of the injured player they’re replacing.
• Announcers must refer to rain during games as “Gorilla Monsoons.”
• Pay-per-view inside sideline medical examination tents.
• The Royal Fumble – all 8 teams play on the same field at the same time.
• Touchdowns missed by referees distracted by staged brawls cannot be reviewed.
Jeff also wondered how it would be different if Jon Bon Jovi had actually bought the Bills.