Odd Things Overheard During Buffalo’s Annual Turkey Trot Race
by Jeff Wozer, Buffalo Sports Page Humorist
The Turkey Trot is an annual Buffalo tradition. It brings out a diverse group of runners. This year, Buffalo Sports Page humorist Jeff Wozer relays some odd things heard during the race.
• “How come instead of a number my race bib has a lobster?”
• “It’s difficult to discern the spectators from the hookers.”
• “This Gatorade sports gravy is low on electrolytes.”
• “Instead of trophies this year top finishers get first dibs at lost & found bin.”
• “I hear some 79 year old runners are lying about their ages so as to mop up in the 80 & over age category.”
• “I would have beat last year’s time had I not mistook Allen Street crime scene tape for finish line.”
• “I think someone put a roofie in my Power Gel.”
• “Parking is limited due to huge crowds lining up for Black Friday pawn shop deals.”
• “Someone in the mayor’s office window is mooning us.”
• “How come the race official is using a starter gun with filed-off serial numbers?”
• “The post-race party is serving micro-baster IPA gravy.”
For more sports humor from Jeff Wozer, visit his author’s section at Buffalo Sports Page.