By Budd Bailey, Buffalo Sports Page
Sometimes it takes a village to write a column – or at least a Twitter feed.
I saw the sign shown above while eating lunch at Wegmans on Monday; it was next to the soda fountain machine. After thinking about it for a while, I decided it had too many comic possibilities to ignore. So, I put it on Twitter, asking for marketing slogans. My sample caption was “Has an expiration date of April 4.”
As of Tuesday morning, the simple post has received more than 28,000 views. Sabre Nation apparently had a lot of fun with the concept, as these answers indicate:
“Goes down easy.”
“A low energy drink”
“One of those drinks that used to taste better than it is now. Occasionally, it hits like it used to, but only for a brief period of time.”
“No sweet, just sour”
“Looks terrible when it touches ice”
“The drink is flat but continues to rise in price.”
“Good until November of any year.”
“A promising looking beverage at first glance. Starts out bold, strong and robust. Swirls with mediocrity and then a disappointing sour finish. Ingredients: tiny bits of hockey heaven, Terry’s tears and cleanser.”
“It’s awful, yet you come back for more …”
“Probably won’t take you the distance.”
“Comes with its own broken cup holder so you get that real KeyBank Center experience”
“New look; same disappointing taste.”
“Tastes better in your favorite TANKARD”
“Tastes Great!! Less (trophy-case) Filling!!”
“They should call it ‘The Winning Streak,’ because that seems to only be available for a limited time as well.”
“Usually stored in the basement.”
“Selling lemons since 2008.”
“Goes great with a spring round of golf.”
“Better get it now. It will probably cost more next season.”
And the winner was: “*Cup not included.” My expanded version of that was “(Only sold in bottles and cans; Cups not included.)”
By the way, I couldn’t find it in the soda machine or in the aisles.
Yeah, the fans around here are a little down. And quite clever.
Here is the sign in its entirety.
(Follow Budd on Twitter @WDX2BB)
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