Top Rumors on How Sean McDermott Celebrated His First Win

by Jeff Wozer, Buffalo Sports Page Humorist

– Sold game ball on eBay.

– Went through New Era Field’s Lost & Found bins and grabbed sunglasses for his kids.

– After stadium emptied joined GM Brandon Beane at midfield doing donuts in team’s medical cart.

– Borrowed Terry Pegula’s private jet to fly to California to toss Timbits at Al Michael’s front window.

– Called Schopp & the Bulldog claiming to be Lou from Lancaster and suggested “McDermott for Coach of the Year.”

– Joined Terry Pegula in team’s Concussion Protocol tent for an all night poker party.

– Had an intimate moment with his wife and referred to it as “part of the family process.”

– Hung out on his roof dressed in a loin cloth gnawing on the skull of a wolverine.

– Attended a kegger at the Celery character’s house.

– Used his clout as an undefeated coach to talk Terry Pegula into having Kevin O’Connell stand in for him the rest of the year on the Sean McDermott Show.

– Hung out at the Big Tree Inn wrestling people for beers.

– Used cell phones being held New Era Field’s Lost & Found to call Bill Belichick’s home phone and yell, “We’re in first – process that hoodie boy!”

Jeff Wozer

Nationally touring stand-up comedian Jeff Wozer has performed with some of comedy’s biggest acts – Martin Short, John Oliver, Brian Reagan – and on some of comedy’s biggest stages – Red Rocks Amphitheater, the Las Vegas strip, Great American Comedy Festival.

His humor articles have appeared in more than 40 publications including ESPN’s Active.com, Rocky Mountain Sports and the Explorer Club’s Explorer’s Journal.

Prior to veering into comedy he worked as a sports and news director for WFAD in Middlebury, Vermont where he won an Associated Press award for hockey play-by-play. And he spent two years as the play-by-play voice for the Vail Avalanche junior hockey team in Vail, Colorado.

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