by Jeff Wozer, Buffalo Sports Page Humorist

Earlier this week, the Sabres cleaned out their lockers at the Key Bank Center and headed for the offseason.  Along with strong statements from Jack Eichel & Ryan O’Reilly, there were other shocking revelations, as sports humorist Jeff Wozer uncovered.  It may explain why the team was so distracted and uninspired this season.

• Players were miffed the Pegulas used team locker room for their Tuesday night bridge club.

• Buffalo’s bar scene no longer fun without the added edge of trying to keep Evander Kane out of trouble.

• Players unsettled by that creepy guy from those Veins, Veins, Veins commercials always hanging around in locker room.

• Pot Luck supper pregame meals.

• Persistent rumors that Phil Housley wanted to name Ryan O’Reilly’s beard team captain.

• Never knew if Channel 2’s Adam Benigni was in locker room to do a sports report or break a news story.

• Constant stress from wondering if Cellino & Barnes would reconcile their differences.

• Pegulas reneged on promise to install locker room shower heads with soothing rain shower setting.

• Players were miffed that popular parents’ road trip was limited this year to a field trip to the Buffalo History Museum.

• No one to impress after learning Channel 7’s Ashley Rowe got engaged

Read Jeff Wozer’s Top Mistakes by Phil Housley.

Jeff Wozer

Nationally touring stand-up comedian Jeff Wozer has performed with some of comedy’s biggest acts – Martin Short, John Oliver, Brian Reagan – and on some of comedy’s biggest stages – Red Rocks Amphitheater, the Las Vegas strip, Great American Comedy Festival.

His humor articles have appeared in more than 40 publications including ESPN’s Active.com, Rocky Mountain Sports and the Explorer Club’s Explorer’s Journal.

Prior to veering into comedy he worked as a sports and news director for WFAD in Middlebury, Vermont where he won an Associated Press award for hockey play-by-play. And he spent two years as the play-by-play voice for the Vail Avalanche junior hockey team in Vail, Colorado.

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