by Jeff Wozer, Buffalo Sports Page Humorist

While he’s busy running the Bills and the Sabres and the Beauts and the Harborcenter and 716 and the Labatt Brew House, Terry Pegula still has some time for New Year’s resolutions.  Sports humorist Jeff Wozer has uncovered what the billionaire owner wants to do in 2019.

• Seek help for compulsive team buying disorder.

• Remember to leave driveway entrance gate open in case the Publish Clearing House Prize Patrol needs to reach him.

• Have tires rotated on private jet.

• Put foot down and tell Brian Duff he can no longer live in his basement.

• Get bit by a radioactive spider and become a super hero.

• Use the birthday gift Sean McDermott gave him, a $25 dollar Cracker Barrel gift card, before it expires.

• Change home’s security code number to stop John Murphy from coming over uninvited to use sauna.

• Head the NFL owners Social Committee and push for a toga party.

• Remove “Justin Bieber Kicks Ass” chest tattoo.

• Rename “One Buffalo” to “Pegula’s Planet of Perspiring Players.”

Jeff Wozer

Nationally touring stand-up comedian Jeff Wozer has performed with some of comedy’s biggest acts – Martin Short, John Oliver, Brian Reagan – and on some of comedy’s biggest stages – Red Rocks Amphitheater, the Las Vegas strip, Great American Comedy Festival.

His humor articles have appeared in more than 40 publications including ESPN’s, Rocky Mountain Sports and the Explorer Club’s Explorer’s Journal.

Prior to veering into comedy he worked as a sports and news director for WFAD in Middlebury, Vermont where he won an Associated Press award for hockey play-by-play. And he spent two years as the play-by-play voice for the Vail Avalanche junior hockey team in Vail, Colorado.

Leave a Reply