by Jeff Wozer, Buffalo Sports Page Humorist

This season, the Bills debuted a new look for Billy Buffalo’s mascot costume.  Not everyone loved the adjustment, and rumors are flying about why the change was made.  If there’s rumors, then there’s sports humorist Jeff Wozer there to track them down.

• Old costume gave the Pegula’s dog mange.

• New costume was the only way to convince Mayor Brown to return for another year as Billy Buffalo.

• Cleaner image needed to get consideration for replacing Chris Collins on the November ballot.

• Old costume was part of Russ Brandon’s severance package.

• It heeded bad advice by using Kenny Roger’s plastic surgeon.

• Too many middle school complaints that the old costume reeked of malt liquor.

• Cleaner look needed in an attempt to stay ahead of breaking story it paid Miss Piggy $130,000 in hush money.

• Change came after it read Steven Covey’s “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Mascots.”

• Team caved into public pressure for a mascot that looks like a Care Bear on steroids.

• The Pegula’s wanted the old costume as a throw rug on their yacht.

Check out Jeff’s take on Buffalo worst sports memorabilia & top ways Buffalo thanked Andy Dalton.

 

Jeff Wozer

Nationally touring stand-up comedian Jeff Wozer has performed with some of comedy’s biggest acts – Martin Short, John Oliver, Brian Reagan – and on some of comedy’s biggest stages – Red Rocks Amphitheater, the Las Vegas strip, Great American Comedy Festival.

His humor articles have appeared in more than 40 publications including ESPN’s Active.com, Rocky Mountain Sports and the Explorer Club’s Explorer’s Journal.

Prior to veering into comedy he worked as a sports and news director for WFAD in Middlebury, Vermont where he won an Associated Press award for hockey play-by-play. And he spent two years as the play-by-play voice for the Vail Avalanche junior hockey team in Vail, Colorado.

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