by Jeff Wozer, Buffalo Sports Page Humorist
It’s a painful reality for Buffalo football fans. But with the news of Josh Allen being promoted to starting quarterback, it likely means the Bills won’t be a playoff team this season. Sports humorist Jeff Wozer has found other signs that a Super Bowl trip won’t be happening.
• NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell waives drug testing for the Bills.
• Team signs streaker guy as a wide receiver.
• To add urgency to team’s offense, instead of two-minute warning Bills are issued a 14-minute warning.
• Terry Pegula texts Jon Bon Jovi, “Still interested?”
• Desperate for something positive McDermott tosses challenge flag after losing coin toss.
• Bills fans rush the field and topple both goal posts after team makes a first down.
• Independent Health announces it recognizes “being a Bills fan” as a preexisting health condition.
• Hurricane Spin Scrubber infomercial has better local TV ratings than Bills games.
• McDermott blames Baltimore loss on Russian interference.
• Pancho-Billa changes name to Pancho Packer-ito.