by Jeff Wozer, Buffalo Sports Page Humorist
The Sabres have won eight in a row. Buffalo hockey fans are as excited as they’ve been in years. Sports humorist Jeff Wozer has seen signs that the bandwagon is getting crowded.
• Mayor Brown has started a GoFundMe page for signing Jeff Skinner.
• Congressman Chris Collins overheard telling fellow politicians they can make millions betting on the Sabres current 66-1 odds to win the Stanley Cup.
• Shark Girl seen making out with Tim Horton statue.
• Kim Jong-un has ordered no nuclear testing during Sabre games
• St. Joseph Cathedral organist now opens every mass with Sabre Dance.
• Crime boss Whitey Bulger was reportedly attacked in his cell after saying, “Sabres suck.”
• Sabre Tooth now dating Taylor Swift.
• The Instigators talk show last week experienced a double-digit ratings gain with Buff State students from NYC expecting to see Knicks highlights on MSG but were too hungover to change the channel.
• Spiking tensions between Sabres Mafia and Bills Mafia for control of the area’s black market for folding tables.
• Jeff Glor announced plans to broadcast the CBS Evening News while sitting on Rob Ray’s lap.